Men grow up expecting to be the hero of their own story. Women grow up expecting to be the supporting actress in somebody else's.

-Laurie Penny

I grew up on John Green novels. The Fault in Our Stars was one of the first longer books I read, followed closely by Looking for Alaska and Paper Towns. I was obsessed with the female characters in those books: Hazel Grace, Alaska, and Margo, respectively, each character with friend groups mostly comprised of boys who were in love with them. I wanted to be them (an early indicator of my queerness if nothing else). I loved how they were perceived and I wanted to mimic them. I was never the type of girl who had guy friends. I always surrounded myself with other girls; I felt more comfortable that way. But the girls in these books were comfortable anywhere and could attract the company (if not with an attitude) of anyone. 

Then, I branched out to books like The Perks of Being a Wallflower and noticed a similar pattern. I wondered why the boys in my grade weren’t pining after me the way they did for Sam. Was I not cool enough? Not pretty enough? 

Only in high school did I realize the further implications of this pattern in the media around me and learn what it was called: a trope. Each character I’ve mentioned, and many others from the early 2000s, could be categorized as a Manic Pixie Dream Girl. She is charming, alluring, and as Nathan Rabin, a media critic who coined the term in 2007, puts it “psychotically bubbly.” She helps to break the main male character out of his shell, only to disappear later in the story once she has fulfilled her purpose. Notice the use of the word “psychotic.” The Manic Pixie Dream Girl will often be emotionally suffering, but that is pushed aside almost entirely to return to the male protagonist's storyline. 

Seven years later, Rabin himself admitted to the problematic nature of the trope. He wrote in his article titled I’m sorry for coining the phrase ‘Manic Pixie Dream Girl,’ “The trope of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl is a fundamentally sexist one, since it makes women seem less like autonomous, independent entities than appealing props to help mopey, sad white men self-actualize.” 

Now, though, I’ve observed a shift in the portrayal of women in media. I’m curious about the connection between the moody, emotionally reclusive, but magnetic, Manic Pixie Dream Girl and the increasingly common portrayal of the “unlikeable” female character. Shows like Fleabag and Girls and novels like My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh and Conversations with Friends by Sally Rooney are examples of this. Each of these lead female characters has a fully fleshed-out and complex story, and, at their core, they all share an overwhelming bitterness toward the world around them. Not only this, but they seem almost indifferent to the presence of their love interests; fully able to maintain their narratives without them, but, oftentimes, choosing to keep them around. These characters are not Manic Pixie Dream Girls by any means; they are filled to the brim with agency, but they do seem to be a direct evolution of the old trope’s “not like the other girls” mentality. 

Unlike pre-teen Gemma, girls today don’t want to be Manic Pixie Dream Girls and frequently make fun of their representation. The rise of social media platforms like TikTok and Instagram has created its own set of expectations and traits that young women today are forced to mold themselves into. Now, women are not only expected to maintain the unrealistic beauty standards touted by influencers, but are also expected to have a carefree attitude towards those standards, like all of their favorite characters in TV, movies, and novels. Throughout history, women have been expected to fit into society's ideal picture of them. The Gibson Girl, The Flapper, and The Waif are all examples of previous impossible standards for women. Now, we have tropes like The Manic Pixie, The Unlikable Woman, and The Influencer. The truth is society will never stop creating unrealistic standards for women and flaunting them in the media. We just have to remember that no real person will ever be able to live up to those daunting expectations, and media can be enjoyed and not emulated. I wish I could’ve told my younger self that. 

Check out our social media for more resources: 

Head over to our social media for more resources and you can find more articles like this on Lemon-Aid.

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/necessarybehavior 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/necessarybehavior/ 

Twitter: https://twitter.com/necessarybehavi 

Tumblr: https://necessary-behavior.tumblr.com/

Sources:

Featured Image via Stephen Hocking

 https://www.salon.com/2014/07/15/im_sorry_for_coining_the_phrase_manic_pixie_dream_girl/

https://www.newstatesman.com/politics/2013/06/i-was-manic-pixie-dream-girl