Transcribed by: Caitlin Carr

Zoe: Hey everyone welcome to the last episode for season 2 of Lemon Ade I'm here with my usual besties London and Bethany and- hold on I didn't say my name sorry sorry. 

Bethany: Your doing fine I don't know why you stopped. 

Zoe: Oh cause I didn't introduced myself, I skipped that. I skipped over that 

Bethany: I got it done, I’m here with my besties Bethany and London and I’m Zoe blah blah blah

Zoe: Oh yeah, well ok… <chuckle> anyways. 

London: You don't always have to be first zoe!

Bethany: God zoe! 

London: Singular host.

Zoe: Yeah but like I could be!

Bethany: But I could be!… jesus. 

Zoe: <Laughs>

London: The singular speaker.

Zoe: Listen for all this hard work that  i have to do creating an intro i better be first . <laughs> 

Bethany:  Yeah, yeah,yeah,  mmm really mmm, noted, I'll just click outta here I guess Zoe can run it by herself. 

Zoe: <laughs> 

(disconnect sound) 

Zoe: I personally love lemon, but anyways 

Bethany: We all love lemons over  here at Squirt Well called it Squirt for a reason ladies ome on ladies. <exaggerated laugh> 

Zoe: Squirt. 

Bethany: Somebody who was just thinking of the lemon think is sitting there like….”ohhh.” 

Zoe: Ohhh it's not a lemon?!

Bethany: -Right now just having the realization, like “ohh”

Zoe: No baby, it's my drink… and not the soda.

Everyone: <laughs>

Zoe: I’m Zoe the - anyways um <laughs> Fuck. 

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London: Like the fisting, that was for pleasure , fine, that one- like bottle that was like, I can't believe yall are doing that to your vaginas 

Zoe: You know what if Envy ever decides to make a wine bottle company, you know thats coming up. 

Bethany: They're gonna make like vagina safe wine bottles in the future. The pussy pro-

Thats what we’ll call our wine company: Pussy proof

Zoe: <gasps> Pussy Proff,  oh my- someone put that down, someone write that down quick. 

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Zoe: Is that a man cough in the back. Who is that? 

London: Yeah I heard someone coughing  too

Bethany: Yeah thats my Codey in the back. 

Zoe: Hi Codey! 

Zoe: Hi Codey!

Bethany: yeah they heard you coughing 

London & Zoe: <laughs> 

Bethany: Hold on their saying hi let me unplug my headphones.

Codey: I'll take smoother hits next time I apologize. 

London: Thank you!

Zoe: No your good, I  was  just like, who is that, theirs a man in here, i dont understand

 Bethany: Your breaking up the feminine energy 

Zoe: exactly <laughs> 

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Zoe: I don't have enough time.. anyways someone need to get masturbated and thats me 

London: it's the hysteria 

Zoe: <laughs> 

Bethany: It's the hysteria. You know what i want, what I wish, I want a lobotomy like can yall just like click click that shit out of ny head. Like sometimes I sit there and  I'm like,  I bet being lobotmized is nice, you just sitting there vibing. 

Zoe: <laughs

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Zoe: You cant fuck with us 

London Exactly 

Zoe: Some one just wearing fucking like killstars like just absoluste fucking curb stompers yeah thats it 

Bethany I feel would like uh, on the, uhh, the public platform that we in fact do not plan on curb stomping or using weapons against anyone. 

Zoe: Mmm, we might…

Bethany: Please dont say that. Hey Zoe dont say we might shut the fuck up 

Zoe: Listen, few- 

Bethany: NSA is like tracing 

London: Allegedly, we wont do those things 

Zoe: Allegedly. 

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Bethany: Like how long until i gotta start watching ads before I can use my fucking toys

Zoe: Yeah thats real.

Bethany: It's gonna be like- 

Zoe: Capitalism at it again. 

 Bethany: -This ad is brought to you by the home depot, like- 

Zoe: <laughs> Come again soon! 

Bethany: Live more, get it better like idk get wetter, whatever the fuck they want to put as the slogan on vibrators 

Zoe: Live more, get wetter 

Bethany: But  like-

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Zoe: So what im hearing is that Codey would be great to have on the team.. In the future

Bethany: Yeah Codey do you want an intern gig darling?! I know that your doing security later

London: <Gasps> Is he gonna wear a skirts, is he gonna wear a skirt? Our uniform is gonna be skirt

Zoe:  Do we have skirts, or-I thought it was everyone was dressed up in like a latex getup

London: Yes but it's a latex skirt. So I need to be in like booty shorts or a latex skirt. 

Bethany: Um so, so, so, Cody’s responds to will he wear a skirt, is it wouldn't be the first time

London: Ok that's great. It’s either, I think-

Zoe: Would it be the first time for a latex skirt?! <laughs>

London: I think the uniform gonna be like a skirt or booty shorts, like those are your options. But like pants you cant wear pants thats a part of-

Bethany: Or you can have booty shorts. 

London: As security you can't wear pants, You have to be sexy to be able to distract people. 

Zoe: <laughs> 

Bethany: I feel like booty short would be better! I wanna see him walking around in like booty short

Zoe: <laughs>

London: We have to distract people with our sexy next then attack them

Zoe: <laughs>

Bethany: but like he looks like a mall cop from the top up and then just like the hot pants on the bottom 

London & Zoe: <Laughs>

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Zoe: Thank you <laughs> for research purposes 

London: Hr checks our emails there like what the fuck 

Zoe: Literealy 

London: Its just bethany, shes our hr, shes like come on guys

Zoe: And the notes like-

Bethany I have the write the email later scolding you both, yeah I know 

Zoe: is it bad if its like: London you have my permission to send me the p*** you find. Is that loud. <laughs>

Bethany: I mean thats kinda bad of both of you, that why i have to yell at you both 

Zoe: Fair enough 

London: Where like this is research for the podcast…

Zoe & London: <laughs> 

London: just researching 

(disconnect sound) 

Bethany: Ohio, Iowa, whatever.

Zoe: yeah bitch we got fucking corn instead of potatos, excuse you!

Bethany: Yeah excuse me, I’m sorry..

London: Corn versus potato war. 

Zoe: I will be front line in that war!

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Zoe: The foreskin story. Four skins in seven night ago <laughs> 

(disconnect sound) 

Zoe: Um that's not really a thing i'm in to…. I can fist you… don’t come at me- 

London: Zoe…ok I don't know if fisting- I don't know if this is TMI…

Everyone: <Laughs> 

London: I went down a rabbit hole- 

Zoe: Yeah! 

London: and I was like, you know wha when I imagine it in my head, i was like, it was so much worse then actually seeing it.

Zoe: Yeah, it’s kinda hot. 

London: It's not but worse that having a dick in you 

Zoe: Yeah exactly 

Bethany Im so red right now you guys.. 

London & Zoe: <laughs>

Zoe: So I found out that london has a breeding kink- 

London No I just wanted to say that because, I forgot but you reminded me, definitely I went down a little fisting rabibit hole-

Zoe: It's a fun time! 

Bethany: You know I just edited an episode where London was talking about her going down a bad dragon rabbit hole so i feel like we learning so much about her and her preference. 

Zoe: True 

London: I go down rabbit holes and I don't stop even when I should.

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 London: Let’s expose you Zoe, have you ever driven under the influence 

Zoe: Uh yeah for sure. <laughs> 

London: Ooh ok I love that for you. 

Bethany: Ooh that's bad, don't root for it.

Zoe: I know that’s bad, I know it’s bad 

Bethany: No no I’m not saying you should lie but London literally over here like, “I love that for you,”- 

London & Zoe: <inaudible>

Bethany:- and im like its one thing to be to <inaudible> but another to be like: yeah DUI woo,” like what the- 

London: I realized it and didn't even really think about what she had said-

Bethany & Zoe: <laughs> 

London: -And I was just like, “ I love that for you,” but thinking about it, um no don't drive under the influence kids it's very bad, please don't be like Zoe over here, learn from her mistakes.

(disconnect sound) 

Zoe: Any of you have a pool, I’ll go skinny dipping 

Hey hey dont make me have to call HR 

London: we.. made HR 

Everyone: <laughs> 

London: immediately <laughs> Zoe’s  gonna me like, “you can come however, whatever, have everything hanging, have everything just out, lets go!”

Bethany: Fucking bitch out, like lets go. 

Zoe: you’ll see theres like a kiddy pool in the middle of the office one day and it's like me showing up with no kid and everyones like, “ what the fuck,”- 

Bethany: <laughs>

Zoe: im like, “ we’re going skinny dipping today you guys?! <laughs>

Bethany: <laughs> 

Zoe: <inaudible> ….always popping my p****

Bethany: <histerical laughter> 

Zoe & London: <Laughs>

London: Everyone’s just like” we wanted to come to work today Zoe what they fuc-” 

Bethany: Oh my god, I'm gonna call in sick that day you guys…

(disconnect sound) 

London: Imagine that im trynna sleep have a good night rest and this n**** trynna- oop, im getting a little oop- but he trynna come in- <laughs>, got a little too casual 

Bethany: No your fine it's ok, I’d cut it if one of us said it, but i dont care if you say it, I don't know if thats a double standard or something

London: If one of us say it <laughs 

Zoe: If someone else say it they’re not working here!

Bethany: No your fine I don't care i mean I'll cut it if you would like me too that's fine 

London: No I dont care I was just like ooh- no I was just shocked because I was like ohh London you got casual, real casual, real quick but like it is late and I'm tired so whatever 

Bethany: I like that you feel like you can get casual with us, like were friends.  

London Um we are friends come on we know about each other pus****

Bethany: Promise that were friends not coworkers anymore cause thats is a problem when we record sometimes 

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Zoe: are you gonna ready the first one?

Bethany: Yes hold on?

Zoe: oh ok. 

Bethany….sheesh

Zoe: Sorry I didn't know what was happening, I was like, “should I?”

Bethany: its ok its fine 

London: Zoe said do your job

Bethany: I am doing my job, we're all here arent I?!

London: Your doing amazing!

Bethany: I know that you for noticing!

(disconnect sound) 

Bethany: Every year judged scope out the neighboor and decides who has the more festive home. Everyone who has- oh (jumbled words) anyone- everyone- oh my god fuck me, I gotta take a hit hold on, that’s my problem

Zoe: <laughs> 

(disconnect sound) 

London: Gotta be a momma, gotta be a mom-trepreneur 

More coming soon!